Family By Choice

 I have people who'll need this line, DISCLAIMER: This is about a K-Drama.

I've never rewatched a story on screen, while I sure have reread multiple novels or rewatched a series. It was never a remake that I could watch because it felt different from the original art in a form I never really liked. Frankly, if I know it's a remake I'll probably drop it very early into the story, probably as soon as I realize that I'm redoing the same tale again. But what went along this time was different. This one K-Drama is a retelling of the very hit and classic Chinese Drama “Go Ahead”.

I've chosen it for a reason, I promise.

Starting off easy, the story revolves around the story of three little children living without their parents. A young girl, whose mother died too early for her to remember, a little boy—  whose father was out of the scene and his mother left him to another parent so she can basically earn some money (you later find out she was involved in a criminal case, and of course for the ease of the story she never really returns to see her son). The third child is a little boy, whose family moves in as a whole after the loss of his little sister (you later find out she died due to an accident after choking on a walnut, half of this context was gathered from the C-Drama while the other half is from a K-Drama). His mother seems to have some issues accepting the death of her daughter, and it reflects in her upbringing of the little boy instead. Soon after she leaves the Boy with his father for she cannot bear the pain of living with the painful memories she gets reminded of living with the father and son (she blames the son for not helping his sister sooner and the father being out of home that night, when in fact it was her duty to look after the children since their father was away (Hypocrite she is)).

I won't exactly steal the plot and discuss the whole storyline here, rather what I'll talk about is the comfort of home I felt both times while watching the drama. This led me to finish a remake for the first time. The very first part that latched onto me was the nostalgic vibe of the show, both in the original and remake. You feel at home with the storyline from the get-go, and that really attaches you to the characters and the story, all the while engaging you straight into every conversation of the series. 

A little later in the narrative, you come across a unique bond that has formed over the years among the three children. As high schoolers, they live through multiple school fights, weird questions, stresses and plans together. It really shows out how the bond between family isn't formed from blood alone. How it's the people you stay closest to that have an impact on you much greater than people you're supposedly bound to. 

And that really helps you put things into a fresh perspective. For me, the way the two boys could bond with the little girl so easily, and consider her a friend even after being discarded or disregarded by their own family shows a unique aspect of relationships. It is an aspect we tend to forget about, which is that truly beautiful relationships usually bloom only under adversities. There was a point in his childhood where the male lead would go sit out on the stairs every time he would hear his parents fight. He wouldn't be alone, though, because he would frequently be joined by the female lead, who would be jollying about candies and toys and all the stuff she liked. 

Metaphorically, it was him running away from the feeling of discomfort caused in his own home, to a feeling of comfort away from home. As a person coming from a chaotic (though beautiful) family myself, I could relate to that feeling, the need to run away to somewhere you feel safer. And for the same reason, I could relate to the little moments throughout the series where the impact of these fights would reflect on him.

Actions speak louder than words, and every bit of their story has proved it bit by bit. Be it the male lead's mother, who returns further into the story guaranteeing to love him, even after leaving him hanging alone at such a young age, or the father who never stopped loving his own wife enough to remarry. He just raised his little boy with all the love he could gather. Similarly, from the younger brother's story, where his mother abandons him with his aunt to go set out a business of her own after paying her debts but never returns even just to greet him. It was his foster-father who took him up and raised the little boy, and again, his actions in helping his father out speak way louder than he could ever express.

The feeling of abandon and grief is weird, at the very least. And both the shows deal with it, exactly for what it truly feels like. This in my opinion was the beauty of the whole story. Finding love away from the place you're meant to find it, know it, experience it, and learn to grow despite being dealt unfair cards. To have a support in another person so strong, it becomes your true home when even your own house doesn't feel like home. 

There's a part of every child, who wasn't dealt the fair cards of love, that craves this feeling of home, and here's the thing—although the entire narrative was about finding comfort in other people, the leads don't truly feel complete until they find a place of peace in themselves first, until they deal with their own demons and insecure thoughts first.

And that really is the essence of life, finding home in oneself, so you can be home for another.

Love Love,

Rashima <3

Cast of "Family By Choice"

Cast of "Go Ahead"